Leyendo estoy un excelente novelón actual, Here I Am, de Jonathan Safran Foer—y descubriendo ciertas afinidades. Pues yo también estoy, o estaré, aquí. Dicen que para madurar hay que enterrar al padre. Pero habrá que empezar por enterrar al abuelo (Isaac, padre de Irv, que es padre del protagonista Jacob). Así se entierra al abuelo, o al padre, en el capítulo "The Names Were Magnificent" ("Not to Have a Choice Is Also a Choice"):
Jacob wanted to go to his
father's side, as he had as a child, and ask him how he managed to
shovel dirt into his father's grave.
Did you think it was disgusting?
I did, his father would have said.
I couldn't have done it.
His father would have laughed a father's laugh and said, One day you'll do it.
What if I can't?
Children bury their dead parents, because the dead need to be buried. Parents do not need to bring their children into the wrold, but children need to bring their parents our of it.
Irv handed the shovel to Jacob. Their eyes met. The father whispered into the son's ear: "Here we are and will be"
When Jacob imagined his children surviving him, he felt no version of immortality, as it's sometimes unimaginatively put, usually by people who are trying to encourage others to have children. He felt no contentment or peace or satisfaction of any kind. He felt only the overwhelming sadness of missing out. Death felt less fair with children, because there was more to miss. Whom would Benjy marry? (Despite himself, Jacob couldn't shake his Jewish certainty that of course he would want to marry, and would marry). To what ethical and lucrative profession would Sam be drawn? What odd hobbies would Max indulge? Where would they travel? What would their children look like? (Of course they would want to have children, and have children.) How would they cope and celebrate? How would each die? (At least he would miss their deaths. maybe that was the compensation for having to die himself.)
Did you think it was disgusting?
I did, his father would have said.
I couldn't have done it.
His father would have laughed a father's laugh and said, One day you'll do it.
What if I can't?
Children bury their dead parents, because the dead need to be buried. Parents do not need to bring their children into the wrold, but children need to bring their parents our of it.
Irv handed the shovel to Jacob. Their eyes met. The father whispered into the son's ear: "Here we are and will be"
When Jacob imagined his children surviving him, he felt no version of immortality, as it's sometimes unimaginatively put, usually by people who are trying to encourage others to have children. He felt no contentment or peace or satisfaction of any kind. He felt only the overwhelming sadness of missing out. Death felt less fair with children, because there was more to miss. Whom would Benjy marry? (Despite himself, Jacob couldn't shake his Jewish certainty that of course he would want to marry, and would marry). To what ethical and lucrative profession would Sam be drawn? What odd hobbies would Max indulge? Where would they travel? What would their children look like? (Of course they would want to have children, and have children.) How would they cope and celebrate? How would each die? (At least he would miss their deaths. maybe that was the compensation for having to die himself.)
El abuelo Isaac se ahorca modestamente antes de ir a la residencia de ancianos. Nadie comenta ese hecho en su funeral, pero lo entierran en la sección de suicidas del cementerio judío tras un sabio sermón del rabino. Jacob llora allí con retraso. Pero en su propia vida le afecta mucho más su divorcio de Julia, y aún más le conmueve el deber personal e intransferible que tiene de llevar a matar a su perro decrépito, Argus. El perro es suyo, le dice Julia. Por primera vez se hace totalmente responsable de Argus, cuando lo lleva al veterinario como quien va al matadero. Le cuesta a Jacob aceptar la cuestión, y darle el OK al anciano veterinario que ya tiene la jeringuilla lista: ("¿Está usted listo para dejar partir a Argus?"... Not quite). Pero también termina la novela con Jacob dando muerte a Argus, con la misma palabra hebrea que da título al libro, hineini, "I am ready".
Me ha llamado la atención la coincidencia entre el hineini de Foer y ese otro de Cohen que abre su disco prepóstumo, You Want It Darker. También de Cohen es aquello de
Everybody knows the boat is leaking
Everybody knows the captain lied
Everybody's got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died.
Everybody's talking to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long-stem rose.
Everybody knows.
Everybody knows the captain lied
Everybody's got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died.
Everybody's talking to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long-stem rose.
Everybody knows.
—oOo—
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